Had a great weekend spending time with my favorite people in JAX and really enjoyed all of the quality time! I worked on Monday and told my boss that since the plan was for me to stay on these chemo pills, and they weren’t really effecting me, I wanted to start traveling some again! I was hopeful that maybe my life would be “normal” while I was getting treatment.
WRONG.
I can’t seem to catch a break with this shit. The Oncologist and Surgeon met together to discuss findings from Thursday’s appointment. They found that the mass in my left breast has grown since I first went in a month ago.
I feel so mad and knocked down. It’s hard to keep a positive attitude when every time you think things are going fine, they really aren’t. I know it will just be a bit of an adjustment, but I will come back tomorrow (which is actually today) and be positive again!
Since this son of a bitch is growing so fast inside of me, we are going to start IV chemo. We are meeting on Wednesday to have a “chemo teach” with the team and discuss the port that I will be getting. This will be in my right chest so I can receive chemo without constantly going through my vein.
I am scheduled to get the port put in on Friday morning, which is a fairly non-invasive surgery, but a surgery none the less. I will then go get my first dose of chemo in the afternoon. I am not sure how often or how much or what type I am getting yet, but the first dose will have to be through my vein.
I am happy because we are starting aggressive treatment, but I’m definitely scared shitless. I think it would be concerning if I wasn’t scared, but I’m excited that we are going to be making more aggressive headway. I found some very encouraging stories in the past day about two women with stage 4 cancer. One girl was 14 and has been at St Jude for the past 18 months. She is doing amazing and is on her way home for Christmas!! I also found Stephanie Seban's amazing story (well actually John found it and shared it with me) and I've never felt so encouraged. It is crazy what your body does know, even when you don't have medical knowledge. I had a feeling that this was growing, but was kind of convincing myself that I was overreacting (Julia?! Overreacting?! NEVER.). But with all of this going on, I have realized that your body is capable of amazing things and no one knows it better than you do!
Here is a link to an ABSOLUTELY amazing woman’s story who has quickly become an inspiration!
Here's to being treated, keeping my head up and letting my story inspire others! 😊
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